Friday, June 7, 2013

Do you ever feel like life is one big jig-saw puzzle?

Picture a cold winter day, the comfort of a cup of hot cocoa in hand, and a giant 1000 piece puzzle laid out before you. The outside frame is put together, and a few of the inside pieces have been put into place. All you have to do is put the rest of the pieces in place to see the "big picture". Sometimes this can be a very relaxing process, while at other times, it is nothing but a pile of stress and frustration. 

Life is like this. Or at least right now, my life is like this. I have the comfort of my Lord and Savior, and pieces of my life scattered everywhere. Over the past 2 months we have been searching to find answers to some medical questions. With every new answer, or every new piece added to the puzzle, we find yet another piece to add or another piece to look for. The days have been full of grace, anxiety, joy and stress. 

Yesterday we learned yet another piece to the puzzle of my medical issues. We went and consulted with a friend that has a Naturalist practice. After a lot of double checking and searching she found that my body is possibly fighting something like an Acute Lymphocytic Leukemia.... The electro-dermal scanning machine showed I need a heavy dose of detox herbs to help balance its-self out. Nothing is 100%. This is by no means a medical diagnosis, but it could possibly be a new piece to the puzzle...  

Over the past month, I have become increasingly tired. Walking up stairs, walking out the barn, doing chores, cleaning house, doing laundry, basically normal stuff has become a major exhaustion. After completing simple tasks, I feel like I have just ran a marathon, (or at least 1/2 a marathon). Previously, I just blamed the tiredness on being a mom of 5, nursing a growing baby, and possible thyroid issues. Now that I know my body is possibly fighting off something, the tiredness is to be expected.

So, now the "next piece of the puzzle".... Today, I went and had my blood drawn. We should have the results by Monday. This will help us see how my body is fighting. (My labs from 2 months ago looked great.... ) After we get the results, we will then determine the next step in our journey. We have already made an appointment for the MAYO clinic. They would like to see us on the 1st of July. Depending on the lab results, we will either keep the July 1st appointment, or we will do our best to move things up a bit. But, again, we need to have a better idea on what is going on before we take the next leap!

In the meantime, our naturalist has started me on a very strong regimen of detox herbs. I am so thankful I will be able to take them while still continuing to nurse Ryka. The side effects of the herbs could include, headache, nausea, and energy loss. I also am leaning about the alkaline diet and anything else I can do naturally to help my body fight whatever it has going on. 

We have had so many offers to help, and I want to let you know, I appreciate them from the bottom of my heart. I am not good about asking for help, or telling people how I need help- especially when it comes to me. So, a friend suggested I write a list for people to see and choose from. I love lists and am good at writing them, so.... here I am sharing with you my "To Do" list! :) 

~Clean House
~Do Laundry
~Make Meals
~Clean Fish Tank
~Budget Check-book
~Plant flowers
~Mulch Garden
~Organize Kids' Bedroom

To wrap everything up, I think we are still in a daze. There are moments when fear creeps in and unexpectadly grabs Casey and I, and our hearts are broken. But we relenquish the fear by realizing this is all in God's hands! Worrying and fearing about tomorrow will only give me a sense of worry and fear! All I want to have right now is peace that passes all understanding, and time with my beautiful children. 

Thank-you for caring. Thank you for your prayers! God is GOOD and He will FIGHT MY BATTLES!! 

~*~ One BLESSED mommie ~*~

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